Sunday, November 4, 2007

Waxing Beds, Freedom, Sunsets and Ayad Allawi

work is AWESOME! i'm getting into reporter mode again...headed to the doha debates to hear ayad allawi try to spin himself out of the mess he created in iraq. there were tons of iraqis in the crowd who got the chance to give him a piece of their mind. quite interesting how far they were allowed to go with their language. www.dohadebates.com for those who're interested.

the magazine is ready for print...it went through censors and all. apparently i'm Nexus Journal will visit Uncle Censor every month. any day now our publishing company in dubai will dhl me the copy dummy before distribution. i just hope to god i caught all the typos and all the stuff that get overlooked when you read a copy 100 times!! i seriously will have a massive fit of epic proportions if there's something wrong. :I i'm working away keeping busy with finishing the december issue and getting january done before heading home. yup!!! going home mid-december for a MUCH needed break from this desert sheikhdom.

keeping with the positive note...there have been things that have made me smile out here. the salon i go to used towels on the beds we lay down on. i told the people running it that it's not hygienic at all and explained how we do it back home....the last time i went, they had stopped using towels and were using the method i explained!

so i finally got a car....i can't explain how incredible it is to be free to come and go as i please. to not rush through the grocery store and mall because the cab is waiting outside. to not be dependent on colleagues aaaallll the time. the driving is INSANE, i've gotten lost pretty much every time i've driven so far and the roundabouts are something else....but those are stories for a rainy day.

as much as everything else in this city gets to me, the sunsets are truly incredible. colors i've never seen blended together in the sky and not just on certain nights...EVERY night. the sun is red sometimes. BRIGHT red, with yellows pinks and purples. today is was orange and purple against the sky's blue backdrop. wow.

on the wedding front....i found shoes i love, love, looooooooooveeee and we've booked our honeymoon!!! i think i'm more excited about it than i am about our wedding. I CANT WAIT!!! i don't think it could get an better. so on that note....i'm gonna try to keep the positive vibes going for the next few weeks 'til i get home pour faire le plein!!!

Thursday, September 27, 2007

quickie quirkies

i can't seem to wrap my mind around some things...

when i went for my driver's license transfer i had to take an eye exam. forget about the sweat stench in the waiting area...or the doorless men's bathroom that has never been cleaned since the building was built...the guy wouldn't let me put my glasses on to read the projection. i read all the numbers and at the end realized that the projection had all been lines of letters...the guy said "don't vury, i rite u no need glasses". made me feel really safe about all the other drivers who get a pass like i did.

got invited to a birthday party for a colleague. i was the only non-lebanese. those who know me, know how much i don't love kareoke.......i was subjected to three hours of it. only it was all old arabic songs. felt so out of place. where are the REAL expats in this country? those here on a professional stop, on their way to better CVs and interesting career paths who aren't desperate for money?

i made a friend...i think!!?? she came in for an interview. we found her, but the job wasn't worth for her to make the move i don't think...we ended up finding someone else. during the interview she admitted she was having issues meeting people like herself and i totally identified. i called her after we finalized our hire, so there was no conflict of interest as far as work was concerned. she was on her way to dubai for work. i was supposed to call her back, but she called this week!! :) so we should be getting together this weekend. i'm starting to get hopeful.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Ramadan Kareem?

thought i'd share the following with you...it was issued by the american embassy explaining ramadan rules in qatar. please pay close attention to the word "illegal". i feel like a hostage.

Muslims are required to fast from sunrise to sunset during the month of Ramadan. As such, it is illegal in Qatar to eat, drink (even water), or smoke in public during fasting hours, i.e., approximately 5:00 a.m. until 6:00 p.m. Approximate times for sunrise and sunset will be announced in local newspapers. If Muslims are present in the work place, they expect non-Muslims to respect their fasting and not eat, drink, or smoke in front of them, even in motor vehicles, or to prepare food that they can smell or see. As it is illegal to serve food or drink during fasting hours, restaurants will be closed during daylight hours, with the exception of a few hotel restaurants that serve non-Muslims only. Restaurants will begin serving food at sundown, but expect them to be crowded, especially during Iftar, the first meal immediately after sunset. If you are in a hotel, and they do not serve a meal at a time you require, you will find that room service is normally available or the dining room will have an isolated area where non-Muslims are served.

and yes...by illegal it means you risk some form of punishment. i remember ramadan in cairo. granted, egypt is not a muslim nation but at least you had the freedom of choice during this period and religion wasn't forced down your throat even if you don't practice it.

so work hours are now 8am to 2pm. malls have funky morning hours, close most of the day and open again from 8pm til midnight or 1am. what i'm not looking forward to is everyones bad breath. i thought this month would be somewhat similar to my previous ramadan experiences...looks like it's gonna be one hell of a ride.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

the old and the homesick

there was a time when i was in my early twenties...galavanting around egypt without a care in the world. work was work, illness lasted a few days and the future was unknown and exciting. days were led without much care, weekends harbored excitement and surprise and friendships, no matter how fleeting, were great to have. months brought me back to canada leaving me with the fondest memories. much like warm summer days during childhood years...only these are adult memories. the worst remembrances from that period of my life equal the band-aid removals we all endured as children.

fast forward a few years.

now is a time when i'm pushing thirty. when getting sick actually involves hospital visits, treatment and several days bed rest. when the future seems closer and preparing for it seems more necessary. when days have a purpose, weekends are used to ponder the week that just passed and to wonder how to embrace the coming days. a time in life when fleeting friendships aren't worth my compromise. a time when you remember a few years back and wonder how things were so easy not so long ago.

but then again...being homesick and SICK brings out that sort of melancholic thought. it's been exactly one month since my last post. i haven't gotten less cynical. so lets recap...

work: my boss changed his mind about 23 billion times about the magazine deadlines. hopefully we're sticking to the current plan of putting out the business mag in mid-november and the fashion mag in the spring. it is crazy seeing myself put it all together. i don't know how i'm doing it considering the only staff we have so far is a graphic designer and our department head...but somehow it's all coming together. i've got the content down for november and three months after that. we're working on layout now and it's all looking great.

wedding planning: it's getting scary...the amount of money that people want. it's coming out of everywhere. the price to pay for a dream wedding. sometimes i wonder if i should be cutting corners...and then i picture my day without certain elements and i can't do it. so i've decided to bite the bullet and go all out. i don't want to regret anything and i ESPECIALLY don't want go the rest of my life wishing i'd invested a couple extra grand.

social life: i'm feeling guilty for not answering everyone's emails. it's overwhelming sometimes and i feel horrid about it. as for making new friends...you discover quickly who they are when you fall sick. so i had 39C fever last week. there are people i couldn't have done without. let me tell you how horrid it is to feel helpless and feel like no one cares. i was lucky to not be alone...but i was also lucky to see early on the true colors of some i thought i could count on. to be honest...i'm trying but i can't find anyone who has my mentality. i can't become close to girls who wear pancake make-up and line their lips like it's the early 90's and who think eating yogurt for one week and not going to the bathroom is a REAL diet. i also can't get along with bigots who believe that people "chose" to be gay and anyone who admits to homosexuality should be "immediately brought to a psychiatrist". i'm not joking.

so far this country has done nothing but turn me off. a tax-free and wealthy existence is treating me fine...but it will never compare to a highly-taxed canadian one.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

car shopping nightmare

so i go ages without posting and now i post two this week. this one is purely to get my thoughts on paper and maybe to get some advice.

car shopping here is soooooo different from back home.

first you have to understand that a car is everything. you can live in a shack, but it is shameful to have a shabby car. back home, you can live in a mansion and it's still cool to have a hybrid, or actually budget for your vehicle. it's not like that here.

back home, executives may chose to have a smaller more compact car for whatever reason.
here, no executive will compromise on appearances, no matter the reason.

back home hybrids and smaller cars are becoming more popular.
here (first off) gaz is SUPER cheap. about $.20/lt...but when i told a salesman about the popularity of smart cars in montreal because of the price of gaz his reply was:
"so people car more about how much they spend on gaz than how they look to others?"

it was the oddest thing, that people actually care about how they look SO MUCH. it's REAL people. you know, growing up, we're taught to not care about what people think, to do right by ourselves. for soooo long i've lived my life by my own rules, in a place where people play by those same rules. and now i'm in a place where i will actually be treated differently if i apply the rules the same way i did back home.

that being said...the drivers here are maniacs to say the least. you've got the driving habits of germans who are used to the autobahn, the indians haven't met a stop pedal they like and honk like mad, the filipinos who cut you off leaving a little less than half and inch between the cars, so the americans who signal and stop at lights are just a menace because they're the minority and catch everyone else off guard.

since i have gotten here, there hasn't been a day that i haven't seen a reaaallyyyy bad accident. more like collisions, cause one car is usually totalled. and by the way...they shouldn't be called accidents here. they should be called on purpose. the way people drive here it's no ACCIDENT they crash, it's a guaranty that they will crash.

so here are the rules to look at:
1- safety - it's drive at your own risk out here and the bigger your car, the safer your life.
2- reliabilty - because of the heat, engines die fast. a car with a proven history will be bought faster. the roads are really horrible too so SUVs are usually the better choice
3- resell value - (considering i wont be here forever) buyers are discriminating. the name behind a car will sell the car more than anything else.

i've been car shopping with that in mind. looking at the H3, Honda Pilot, Mitsubishi Pajero, Rav4, X3...i have no idea what to do. The pajero (called montero back home) is SUPER popular here, amazing re-sell value and very safe. but i test drove it and i haaaaatttttteeee how it looks and how EVERYONE and their dog has one. i also test drove the X3 and it feels light and flimsy. :( the H3 is empty inside. it looks really plasticky and the resell value is really low.

so that leaves the pilot and Rav4. hopefully one of those cars will fit the bill!!! anyone have experience with either in hot weather and bad terrain??

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Where have all the beggars gone!?

Technically I haven’t been here long enough to know if there have ever been beggars here, but considering the amount of immigrant workers, you’d think SOMEBODY is out there begging. I have not seen an outstretched hand here once, but lots of people look like they could use some extra cash. Hhmmm…maybe it’s pride? Or maybe they should just beg for soap? The working population doesn’t live well at all and their access to water is limited. I can’t imagine what it must be like to only have limited daily access to water and maybe be able to shower once a week.

So I’m still cynical. It hasn’t gotten better at all. I hate that a qatari’s life is worth more than mine here. I hate the heat, you literally can’t walk anywhere without having your clothes getting wet. Yes…WET with sweat. Without ANY exaggeration, I had to peel my shirt off yesterday after walking outside for less than 5 minutes. I hate the way people judge. The middle-eastern mentality x1gazillion is getting to me. I hate that women cover their face and take the niqaab off when it suits them. I hate the underlying sexual undertone you can’t escape unless you are dealing with a real westerner. SERIOUSLY! Why is it that western men GET that men and women can be friends. JUST friends. They can talk, hang out, be workout buddies and THAT’S IT!??? It’s sooooooo frustrating!!! Everyone knows I’m spoken for, so there have been no advances, but I can tell that behaviors that no one would notice back home would get people whispering here.

I meet people here who have spent time in Canada and the US, they consider themselves western, but I STILL see their eyes falter when they ask me my fiance’s nationality and follow up with: “are you muslim!?”, “do your parents know!?”, “are you going to serve porc or alcohol at your wedding!?”, “is he going to come and live with you before you get married!?”, “do you pray!?”. This quasi-wahabi land is starting to get to me. Can you tell?

I’m gonna get off that topic now cause I feel I am at a boiling point. Let’s talk about shopping. I went to one of the malls here, called City Centre. Not bad. The quality isn’t in all the stores but all the major brand names are there. From MAC to Swarovski. So I’m not gonna complain about product availability too much.

Work is moving on. I can’t believe how fast I’ve gotten used to free food and drink all day. The idea of a company cafeteria or vending machines is starting to blow my mind. It’s pretty capitalist if you think about it really :P

I’ve been thinking about honeymoon destinations, any ideas people? I thought Disneyworld would be great guaranteed fun but now it just looks boring. I dunno. Considering the wedding is in early September and I have a MAJOR launch in the Qatar the following month, I wanna make sure Alex and I spend some serious relaxing time, but I also want to sight see and discover places with him, you know!? The invites aren’t out yet, so maybe I shouldn’t worry about it too much for now.

Friday, July 27, 2007

the 1, 2, 3s

the basics of the town are easy....

the bigger your car the less people are likely to violate your driver space. the lower your car, the more likely you are to get bashed (unless you're driving a lamborghini, ferrari etc)

you need a car or you're pretty much stuck. cabs are rare, and you don't take the bus.

you will avoid any and all line-ups if you are not "paid staff". i went for my medical check-up this week. blood test and x-ray to prove i'm not bringing disease into the country. there were well over 100 hundred women in the waiting area, it was embarrassing to have them automatically make way for me to get ahead of the line-up.

your way of dressing defines who you are and how you will be treated.

people are bought.

money grows on trees.

i'm sure i can think of more if i tried hard enough, but that's enough cynicism for one entry.

this week has been interesting, if it wasn't for my boss or the job itself, i'd be on the first flight home. i am a little bit of an outsider. i look like the locals but am far from being one. unless you live it, it's hard to describe and i'm a bit of a sourpuss to get into it today.

the supper i was going to last weekend was great! the restaurant was nice. it was entirely buffet style with a great food variety. they had these super tasty looking lobsters but i couldn't have a bite, alex loves lobster and i can't enjoy it without him. there hasn't been much more activity besides that. there's not much to do, and it's way too hot to be outdoors for longer than 10 minutes at a time.

as for the wedding....it seems so far away right now but i know i should be taking care of little details. i have no idea what kind of dress i even want, maybe i should try some one? and the lady taking care of invitations has been waiting for me to send potential invite wording. it feels like i have forever to do all this!!

Friday, July 20, 2007

Lebanese Cherries

it's the weekend here. fridays and saturdays are the days off. i slept most of the day today, likely recovering from jet lag. not that i hadn't slept enough the night before...i didn't set an alarm and was woken up by the head superintendent explaining why i might not have running water. it came back 20 minutes later and had he not called me, i would have slept properly and wouldn't have even known.


i'm ssttaaaaarving!!! not that there isn't any food here. i went grocery shopping last night at the last minute and hadn't made a list. so i bought fruit and milk and a couple household items. now i realize none of it is enough to give me sustenance!! so today, lebanese cherries filled my tummy at suppertime. hopefully that will be enough to hold me til i write this blog and go grab something.

speaking of grocery shopping, it's beyond pricey here. i don't know how people get by here. the local stuff isn't great quality so you have to buy american or european brands. for example: scott towels are $20 for 6. kellogg's cereals are $9-$12 a box. grapefruit and oranges are ALL from florida and cost $10/kg!! those are all in US $. instead i save on gaz...about $.20/L. YES! TWENTY CENTS per LITRE!! :) the weather is super hot during the day, in the evening you can be outside for a while. right now it's about 33C, which is totally bearable but you get thirsty really fast and started sweating for no reason even if you stand still.

tomorrow i'll get a little taste of life here. one of my colleagues is leaving Doha, which is quite a frequent occurrence apparently, and we are having a goodbye supper for her. i'm looking forward to experiencing the friend/work dynamics.

i hope you guys are reading and enjoying this. there are no computers left in the regular space, so i'm in the smoke infested area of this internet cafe. i'm sure my cancer cells are getting fed very well and preparing to take over more than just my lungs. time to go feed myself.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

counting my lucky stars

so i made it!! i'm sitting at a net cafe, about a five minute walk from my flat....in DOHA, QATAR!!

i cannot explain the pain of leaving my family. the tears at the airport. the line-up before heading into security, snaking our way through the roped line. looking back at my fiance's face. not knowing when i'd see it again...but knowing for sure it wouldn't be for a while. the pain of seeing my mother's face traced with tears. not knowing the pain a mother feels in these situations, but knowing it's enough to add a few wrinkles on her face.

justifying leaving in that situation is not possible. so all i could pray for is that something good may come out of the move, and so far so great. the travelling was easy thanks to a dear friend who hooked me up with an upgrade. the arrival was so-so, the appartment was as well. it took a day or two and everything is in order now. the appartment is fantastic, the weather bearable (mad dashes from a/c in car to a/c in office). the only detail is adjusting to various body odors...consquences of various personal hygiene habits.

the office and colleagues are a bonus. it may be too soon to tell, but everyone is brilliant and i feel more than equipped to do my job.

just a quick thank you for the supportive voices out there. i SO appreciate the time you take to reply to these notes. i write them hoping they'll resonate with someone and know that the fears/joys i face may have been felt by others.

more to come, with greater details about what it's like in a gulfie/quasi-wahabi country. where 34C and humidity is considered "GREAT WEATHER!!".

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Leaving... :(? :)?

I got my ticket confirmation today. I'll be leaving for Doha on Monday. My departure was supposed to be early April and kept getting pushed back...so you'd think I'd be ready by now. I'm not. There is a torrent of emotion going through me and I can't pin each one down. There's so much anxiety, fear and guilt battling with curiosity and excitement. I don't know which one I should allow myself to feel.

My parents are barely settled in and I feel I should be here for them. I'm middle-eastern, so the "it's my life and I should go ahead and live it" doesn't apply. I'm worried how it's going to be for them, but then again, I wonder what difference it would really make if I was here for another week or two. And then I think of my mom, and how she would appreciate my being there for things like painting and picking out colors and materials. She doesn't lay the guilt on at all, but the silence of her saying it hurts even more.

Then there's my fiance. The guilt of forcing seperation on him, as much as he was aware of my goals and dreams when we met, to make this a reality may be too much. To me, being engaged isn't a "trial period", I've been as good as married since he proposed. (For those married folks, I know things change when you're married for real, what I mean is that I have no doubts that he's the one). I wonder where "absence makes the heart grow fonder" comes from. I wonder if I should have waited until we were married to move away like this. I hate thinking "time will tell". Time never tells. Time only reveals peoples behavior, it reveals choices and the consequences they bring. For now, all I can chose to believe is what I know for sure....and that is that my love for him his true and unwavering. My intentions are to build myself into the best, strongest woman I can be and so to be the best, strongest partner my partner may ever need.

And then there's the job itself...there's SSSOOO many "what ifs" where that is concerned. The consequences of loving/hating it. The adjusting to the way of life out there. The meeting new people and making new friends. I don't even have an emergency contact!! Who is gonna be able to rescue me in case I get a major disease??? Ok...thinking about it will just cause more frenzy. I learned long ago that I can analyze and prepare all I want, it still doesn't mean I'll know how to deal with it when I get there. And you can live without an emergency contact, right?

I have a little over five days left in Montreal. I'll try to make the best of each and will attempt not to tinge them with the concerns I've been having the past few hours.

Friday, July 6, 2007

Painting it black...

I must start by thanking you all for your encouragement. I was worried blogging would make everyone think I'm a little self-obsessed and then I figured if I started caring about what other people would think, then I would start censoring myself. A big no-no in my world. I did a radio show at my old job and we were talking about blogging and putting your life out there. Callers were very adamant about how people who blog have nothing to offer really and that there's no need to read about other people when you have your own life to live. I guess they'd be happy to also live completely cut out from the outside world with no human contact apart from a doctor's visit. Those are the people who die and have no one who goes to see them.

So back to blogging...which I will be sure to do without long lapses in time.

Doha is happening soon. I got my work visa this week and my flight is being arranged by the company. There's something final about one-way tickets. Like there is no way back at all, even though you could just book yourself a ticket back. It gave me the shivers when they told me I'd be getting booked on one for mid-July. Level 2 panic came when I found out I'd only be allowed 2x 23kg of baggage instead of the usual 2x 32kg for international flights. Something about airlines not wanting to pay insurance premiums for their employees who get back problems from lifting heavy luggage. I think I'll just shut up and pay the extra $$ and not cut shoes and make-up.

Technically I have a little over a week left here, and even though I anticipated the move, I am far from ready. My parents just sold their house to my fiance and I. It will hopefully be rented soon or the money that was supposed to be saved for the wedding will be spent in mortgage payments, in which case this blog will turn into a fundraising tactic a-la-Star-Jones. So it's been a fairly big move considering they weren't able to land movers. Even middle-eastern bribery (ie: offering your eldest daughter) did not work (and not because she's engaged, but because the companies felt this was an unbalanced trade).

Three rented moving trucks, three days, and many "thanks!" to friends later, we are finally settled in the new place. I use "settled" loosely considering we don't have a fridge or stove til next week. So we paint to keep ourselves busy. My room has gone from a black/charcoal/green to a fabulous canary yellow, the ceiling fan replaced by a small classic chandelier and the furniture I will paint black. Along with the entrance wall and any other accent piece. I've learned that "every room needs a touch of black". I will let you know how it goes.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Hellooo?? Anyone out there???

All right. So I'm here. Turns out this is like a big party you take hours getting ready for and have no clue what to do and who to mingle with when you get there. That's me right now...and not very often me when I get to a party.

So I'll start by stating my case....I'm here mainly because I am going to be travelling soon and find sending people long e-mails about how I'm doing a bit intrusive. Letting my friends know I have a blog will leave them the option of visiting this site whenever they please, and therefore I wont be harassing inboxes with 10k e-mails.

I've read so many blogs and have so frequently been affected by the thoughts of bloggers out there I just happened to stumble upon. Is this how it works? Will I be found on random searches too? Will people read this and move on like I did...take it all in and not leave a comment or two...? Are my posts supposed to be a certain length to keep people interested? hhhmmm

Ok...enough with the questions and on with the self-absorbed qualities required in writing posts. After all, I have to act like I'm an incredibly important and interesting person for ya'll to believe it ;P and leave you wanting more.

I'll stop now...just short of letting you know what you can expect to read here.

I'm newly engaged and on my way to the Persian Gulf. Doha in particular. I didn't misspell Dubai, by the way. Doha is a city in Qatar...and a 45mins flight from Dubai. Work in the glamorous world of publishing is bringing me out there, maybe forever....maybe for a short little while. Who knows? But for now, my future hubby is staying back. *skype much?* The wedding is set for September 2008 in Canada but the details I'll have to plan while in the Gulf. The dress, flowers, decor, invites, transport, guest list, accommodations....and the rest will all be taken care of from an ocean away.

This will be nothing short of a roller coaster ride...emotionally and professionally. Let's see what happens when a girl who fears nothing as much as "settling down" gets ready to say "I do" while trying to prove herself worthy of the dream job she landed....wish me luck!!!